There are people who can't be refused. They don't seem to do anything special, they don't come up with grandiose ideas, they don't slide into persuasion or blackmail, they don't even violate personal boundaries, but it's impossible to refuse them without feeling guilty. These people masterfully mastered the techniques of influence psychology. We tell you what it is, how to recognize these techniques, and how to protect yourself from them.
Psychology of influence is a set of techniques that allows you to change the opinion of the interlocutor in favor of the person who uses these techniques. The impact can be verbal or nonverbal, and the other person is given the right to feedback.
It is this ability to refuse that puts the protective mechanisms of the psyche to sleep, and the traps set direct a person directly to the answer that is expected of him.According to one experimental social psychologist, who was one of the first to study and systematize the techniques of influence psychology, there are 6 basic techniques of manipulation:
Commitment and consistency
In the common people, this is called" sitting on the neck", when at first the manipulator asks his interlocutor for a minor service, which he will not be difficult to provide. With this technique, he establishes contact, and with gratitude strengthens communication, so that the next time — when the request is more extensive — it will be difficult to refuse him. This is also due to the fact that the person who provides a service or makes a concession does not want to lose this gratitude, he is afraid of becoming bad both in the eyes of the manipulator and in his own, and the manipulator takes advantage of this.
Mutual exchange
Within the framework of this scheme, the manipulator himself provides a service to the person, and his victim immediately receives the label of the debtor and, as a "service for a service", fulfills the request of the manipulator. Feelings of gratitude often push people to make unequal exchanges. A person is ready to do anything to avoid being obligated.
This works especially clearly if a person notices an unequal exchange: the manipulator then reduces the rate — asks for a smaller amount of money or offers you a smaller and cheaper product.
Social proof
In this tactic, the manipulator uses the so-called herd sense. It was encountered by every teenager who at least once in his life conducted experiments on appearance and received a response from parents: "what will people think?
A person as a social being tends to be guided by the opinion of others, sometimes it concerns the closest circle, and in some matters, even the gaze of a random passerby can shake our determination.
Authority
The power of authority in a society where there is a hierarchy extends to many areas of life. A person can obey the authority of their superiors, because they consider the boss more competent and domineering (in this case, the belief in the expertise of their superiors and the fear of losing their job work).
And research backed up by the signature" scientists have proven", even without the names of researchers, is perceived with great confidence. In this tactic, the manipulator either uses his authority or refers to someone else's to add weight to his words.
Attachment
This tactic is based on a person's tendency to help those they like. For this sympathy to appear, much is not needed, just kinship, work on a joint project, similar interests or joint experience are enough. A person values such attachments and overall positive goals, so it is less likely that he will refuse the interlocutor any request. This mechanic is at the heart of the game "good and bad cop".
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